Oh Star

And now I let my dreams consume me,
And tell me what to think.
But hold on,
Hold on.
What am I dreaming?

So today was ALOT of fun. I went to Nicole's house, and we went to this one party, it was a lot of fun. There was a game room, a pool, and food to eat. After that, Nicole and I went to Kyle and Alex's house. I had ALOT of fun there too. After I walked Nicole home, Alex, Kyle, and Me got into my car, and started taking pictures, blasting music, and recording things. I am so tired right now.

Tomorrow is this college thing i have to go to. I'm not sure what it's about, but my dad said i HAD to go, or he'd ground me if i didnt. He got VERY angry when i skipped orientation because i was nervous about going by myself. I am going to make my mom come with me, because i am nervous to go by myself again. It's so strange to hear my friends say "See you at school Wednesday!" to my other friends, and all my friend's talking about their senior schedules. I didnt think it would phase me at all, but it made me frown. I dont regret dropping out, it was the best decision in my life, but that doesnt mean i'm not going to miss the people that i cared about in highschool. There is so many people who have my heart as a friend in that school, and i miss them dearly. I looked through my old computer today, and i saw old pictures and songs from 10th grade. All of the memories of a year raced through my head in 5 seconds and almost exited my body with a tear. I dont miss highschool, but i really miss the time period, and things that went on outside of highschool. Spending the night at friend's houses, sneaking out, playing guitar hero, playing ddr, going to third friday. Why does it have to be, that we dont know what we've got till it's gone? I wish i knew what i had. I was depressed throughout those years, and i never knew how good it was. I miss it so much. I would do anything to go back and relive those days. Not change them, but relive them, and smile with happiness on my face, instead of hiding hair over my face which i do now. 

Wow. This is longer than i thought it was going to be. I'll be surprised if anyone reads the whole thing, but if someone does, god bless you for caring :)