Done?

I think I might be done with this.

I might restart back up again.

If anyone did read this,

thank you very much.

I discovered the causes of my unhappiness.

I don't want to list them on here...

But i guess the first step is to realize what they all are.

I made that realization last night. 

I'll talk more about it later. I have to leave for class in like 10 minutes

Wishing to go back

Lastnight I wished to go back in time, and change things... The things I wanted different.

But now, i'm sitting the cafeteria listening to the music that I am going to sing for auditions, and I am looking at all these people and stuff. I kind of like how things are now, besides that I am sad a lot. 

I'm really scatterbrained right now. 

There are a lot of things going on around me.

Literally, and figuratively. 

One day, i'll close my eyes,

and this will all be over,

and i'll wake from this nightmare three years ago in my room,

or i'll wake up and it will be the next day, and my life will turn into a dream.

Perfect.

They will be perfect.

I can see it now.

We will wake up, and spend most of the day hanging up posters, while playing music that is on itunes shuffle. We won't skip any songs, because we each like the same songs. While hanging up the posters, we'll take turns singing along, dancing, laughing, enjoying each other's company. After that we would cuddle on the couch watching TV and music videos. We both love music, so we would never get tired of it. We would then lay around my room talking about life and how things are going to be in the next five years. We would also go on the computer and talk to our online friends and in real life friends. We will laugh, and I will smile while they talk, and be so thankful that I have them, and that I am there's. As we get tired, they would leave, and I would txt them till we both got tired and fell asleep on each other. 

The next time we were both free, we'd hangout again. We could drive somewhere, singing songs in the car as we drove. We would go to the boardwalk, and walk around and play in the arcade. They would congratulate me with a hug after i beat a challenging song on the Dance Dance Revolution machine. Then we would whip out one of our digital camera's and take crazy pictures of each other sitting on the racing game's arcade machines, or the mini-bikes. We would also take pictures of crazy dance poses too. Heck, we would take pictures of us doing EVERYTHING that day that would later be uploaded on one of our myspace's to show eachother off. We would then go play mini-golf, where they would laugh with me since i'm so terrible at it. After that we would make a video of us just chilling on the boardwalk on one of the benches. After that they would drive me home or I would drop them off. I'd kiss them goodbye....

I guess that would be more of a perfect "LIFE" too.

That is just a perfect relationship i could see.

I really hate being all sappy and lovely.

I could see so many other things, hahaha. 

It's almost like, now that i'm thinking about it, perfect seems so boring.

I could imagine me kissing them one day, and falling completely crazy for them,

but it not working out, and fighting for those moments of happiness. 

Wow... WHY AM I SPEAKING OF LOVE? HAHA

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

That's it.

I've seriously gone crazy.

Wow, I need to like, go to bed or something.

I am thinking way too much.

Now that i'm reading what I said, it's so super sappy and so freaking wrong.

Wow..

Um..

Yeah..

I feel stupid now and like deleting this blog.